Thinspo, and Sensuality Training

I don't need no Thinspo.

I really don't. The scale and my goal numbers are all I need as a motivator. The time for visual Thinspo and hot models will come, but right now, it really doesn't matter to me. I know that I am nowhere near those bodies yet. Eventually when I get into weight range of them, I'll need those pics to fine tune myself and know I made it, but right now... not so much.

The scale tells me I don't deserve Thinspo yet. I haven't earned it.

I need to lose 20 lbs. in 2 months. How the fuck am I going to do that?

I'm losing now. Things are going well. But not fast enough. I'm going to have to add more aggressive workouts... or any workouts. With 3 kids around all day, that is a bit of a challenge unless you consider chasing them to be a workout. My youngest is still too small and slow moving for that to be much of a challenge.

I asked myself a unique question this morning though...

What do you want your body to be able to DO once you look the way you want to?

For me, this is very important. This journey is more about my sexuality more than it is even about food. I need to be agile, fluid, sensual. Even in the slightest day to day movements, a beautiful woman's grace and sensuality should shine through and define her. To fulfill my potential I need to also regain my grace and understated sublime physical appeal.

This is no small thing. It is huge.

You can get to skinny this way. But can you get to sexy? There is a huge difference. I see so many ungainly thin girls... models even. They don't know how to move... how to walk... how to do anything really in any sort of appealing way. It's a turn off. The ability to flow is a refinement that makes a thin girl a truly rare trophy.

I used to be pretty good, but that was long ago. Fat bodies can't move that way. So how can I get back there if I'm not thin enough to be it yet?

I can train. I can workout, train my flexibility, dance, and set physical goals of things I'd like to be capable of doing once that 30 lbs is out of my way. And it will help me get that 30 lbs out of the way.

That is the next phase for me.