I'm posting early tonight, then I'm going to watch some show of some kind and go to sleep. I want to get an early start tomorrow morning. I need to get my house in order and can't just skulk around my room forever... as much as I've enjoyed it most of the last 2 weeks.
My end of the day calorie count was about 400 calories.
That's good. I had a cup of japanese clear broth with green onions (osumono) for breakfast, and then a japanese seaweed (wakame) soup for lunch... each at about 30 cals. Then dinner was chinese food. Spicy shrimp and garlic vegetables. That made up the rest of the cal count.
This is the kind of day I can live with. The veggies were crunchy, with lots of vitamins and enzymes still intact. The shrimp where yummy, satisfying, and full of low-fat protein. Thanks to my shrunk stomach from the fast, I feel really full too.
I've been ending every dinner with pickled ginger and it seems to keep me from wanting to snack later. Of course so does the fact that I feel like a bloated pig... even if I didn't overeat. ;) Oh well. Whatever works!
My life is in a crumbled heap around me. I'm glad I've been at this for a while. I've felt completely destroyed before in my life. Despite my whole world being upside down and absolute shit, and me losing my mind nearly completely, I know that it doesn't last. And I'm not the only person who can rebound. So even though the world is whipping in utter chaos, I know it isn't the end of it. I will simply reinvent myself, and if I have to, I'll reinvent the whole fucking world with me. I'll just keep sculpting it and prodding at it until something works, or something make sense.
But for now, my world will have to wait because this is my time. Mine. In the next two months, "I'm bringing sexy back." Everything works better when I'm hot. I'll start my new life there.
I love you! Yes, you, all you here and trying. I know you hear it a lot, but really, stay strong! One day at a time we are changing... there are butterflies brewing here in these cocoons, I can feel it!
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