Much Has Changed, Where Have I Been?

Heather and Kazehana...

You two have locked down your blogs. Can I grab an invite? I've been away a while, but I'd love to stay in the loop.

Hope all is well,

Elle

The Body Spectrum: Too Fat to Too Thin

The spectrum of weight... where do I want to be? Here's the scale from 10 to 0 in photo form:

10.
9.

8.

7.

6.

5.

4.

3.

2.

1.

0.

Right now I'm between 7 and 6... at least I am when you look at my tummy. I'm taller, but I gain in the middle, so if I have ANY fat, I have no curves... unlike girl 5 who despite being a bit heavy has a nice shape. I don't look like girl 5 until around 140 lbs. and I've never looked like girl 4. At 128, I was that skinny, but had no muscle and a bit of pudge in the tummy area.

I think I'd like to be anywhere from girl 5 to girl 3, but I'd NEVER want to be skinnier than girl 3. I think 4 would be ideal.

Tara Firmer: Slim Calm Sexy and... I rant.

Tara Stiles, Tara Stiles, Tara Stiles!!!!

I heart her so much. Really. I do. I now have bought:

Elle Make Better Series: Elle Workout Yoga
It stars Brooklyn Decker, but the yoga workouts are led and taught by Tara Stiles.

Slim Calm Sexy
Tara's book, which I love so much because it is fabulous thinspo. The best! I like yoga, I do have better books for starting a yoga practice, but they don't even come close as any kind of thinspo. This is page after page of beautiful skinniness!!

Yoga Anywhere: The New York Sessions
I just bought this dvd and it is on it's way! I think it gets here Tuesday! XD XD

I still don't have any more info on diet from her, but in one blog quote she does say this:

"Yoga puts us back in touch with our bodies' needs and equips us with the tools we already have: the intuition and awareness to nourish our bodies properly with wholesome, healthy foods. Yoga doesn't show us how to starve ourselves. That is a terrible disorder, as terrible as overeating." - Tara Stiles

The previous paragraph was much longer, mainly talking about how bad it is to over eat and eat poorly. I like that she puts starving and overeating in the same category. THANK YOU! I hate that overeating tends to go ignored while extreme restriction gets all the gasps and sad glances. Sickness is sickness. Unhealthy is unhealthy, and there are a lot more unhealthy FAT bodies in this country than there are unhealthy skinny ones.

Am I obsessed with being skinny? YES! Do I get so upset with myself that I want to or actually do hurt myself sometimes? Yes. Do I use food or the lack of it as a weapon sometimes? Yes I do. I confess. HOWEVER... I would prefer to be healthy and skinny. Am I sick? Do I want to be ill? NO! I want to be thin to be sexy, to be beautiful, to be happy with myself, to reflect well on those who love me. I will get to thin however I can. I am ok with hurting myself to get there, but obviously I'd rather not. I'd rather get there in a way that helps me feel good, not sickly and pathetic. There is no win if you can't enjoy the win.

I guess my point is, yes, I have some issues. The things I do aren't the most healthy, but they also aren't the most sickly. If people have an issue with my ED's or how I cope with them, let a truly healthy person throw the first stone. Most often I see the crap being flung from overweight and even morbidly obese people, and I have no patience for it. They are so much worse than anything I'm doing or dealing with. I'm not in the real starvation danger zone. Not as long as there is muscle and fat on my body and I eat leafy fucking greens. They, on the other hand, ARE in the danger zone! They are in line for stroke, heart attack, diabetes, some cancers, and all kinds of awful stuff, just waiting for their number to be up! So there! :P

hehe Sorry, I get a little heated. Grrr... ;)

-= Comments =-

Gila - You're welcome for the other Tara Stiles post. :) I've been having fun working out to the online vids too. They really do get you sweating! I didn't expect it from yoga, but her kinda of yoga is pretty active and continuous. I love it!

Stalking Sexy Tara Stiles

Slim. Calm. Sexy.

Yes, please. I'm watching some of her blog posts and I hate and love her already. Her skin is so incredible. Tight, supple, gorgeous. I see bones too people! She's perfect. I hearts much.









I'm fucking buying it. Now. This is all I needed to keep my fast going today. Ahhh so good. :) Thank you Tara, you skinny bitch. <3

Now I'm gonna be watching the mail every day til I get it!

~COMMENTS~

Thanks Emry! <3<3<3! I'll do my best! :)

isn't she lovely......

I'm in love with her...

... isn't she great?

I heart her so. She's my picture of the perfect woman. A mom, loving family woman, humanitarian, absolutely stunning and thin, beautiful inside and out, and she does her own stunts!

My Hero.

<3<3<3
<3<3
<3

P.S. Is it just me or has the Ana bloggie world gotten unnervingly quiet lately? I'm starting to worry about people.

House of Thinspo: It's Richard Warren Night

Some of us play with toys...

Some of us are the toys...

<3'spo
xox

Busy Burning Day

Tonight's Patron Saint of Skinny
Ana Claudia Michels

Now More About Me (teehee)

Got up early this morning, went for a mile walk then hit the gym. No 500's today, but I guess I did alright.

I was almost to 45 min and hadn't hit 400 cals yet. I blame it on the fact that I was sick. But I started to freak out! I need at least 400 if not more than 500 or wtf am I doing in there anyway. So I ended hard. I might have looked crazy. I didn't care how out of breath I was either. I was gonna get that 400. As you can see, I overshot it a bit.

Now... if only I could be consistent.

Still trying to eat. And it's still hard. Don't call it recovery. I don't give a fuck about recovery, ED's, diagnosis, advice, or fuck-all. All I care about is the number on the scale. I don't care about tired, or my excuses, or how long I do what. The only thing that matters is that number. So if I have to eat, I'll cram shit in my face. I'm determined, can you tell? Still sux though. Zigzag bitches, zigzag.

That's how my sister Mei got so infuriatingly skinny. She models you know. :P Looks absolutely great. But she's not the skinny build in the family, oddly I should probably be the thinnest. >>P What did Mei do?

SHE ZIGZAGGED!!

She suggests not eating every meal. Some days she hardly eats at all, a few times a week she eats 3 meals. She doesn't eat meat other than seafood. And when she does eat, she eats the richest, fat packed food she can find. Not a lot of sugar, but I think she eats more butter than anyone I've seen in my life. Something her style would be like eggs, veggie bacon, and toast for breakfast, homemade mac and cheese for lunch, and some butter soaked fish dish with a completely loaded baked potato for dinner... and popcorn for a snack. BUT only a couple times a week. The rest of the time, little bits, popcorn maybe, or nothing.

Well anyway, I'm not sure I can do what she does, but I'm trying.

Ok, gotta go watch some movies with my honey. Love you girls!! Keep skinny and strong! <3 xox

SUSHICATNY! Must see!! READ THIS!

Have I been living under a rock? Why have I never heard of SushiCatNY???? She does a weight loss video blog.

Began at 210 lbs...


Then she went on a 30 day water fast, this is day 15...


This is day 30...


Then several months later she discovered (like I have recently) that fasting is counter productive and can make you fatter. >PPPPP (fucking hell) Causes edema, the body taking on water, bloating, etc. Yuck.


Then she moves on to zigzag dieting (between 1200 cals and 2000).


I guess it worked, because 5 months later...


And 3 months later...


The finale...

She basically zigzagged without going quite into starvation mode and danced in her room a lot. Nice. The talking is boring but the results and her awesome drive speaks for itself.

http://www.youtube.com/user/sushicatny

Amazing. I love it. <3 xox

Good Morning Demarchelier Thinspo!

It's 7:00 am, do you know where your fat is?

(no, that is not my actual heart rate.
and i finished out the workout at just over 500 cals burnt. yay!)


And Now Your Morning Thinspo
Viva Patrick Demarchelier!

(I want this one hanging on my wall. Beautiful.)

4th of July and Summer Thinspo

Stars and Stripes Baby

Summer Sublime

Yarr...

Thinspo in a Boyfriend Pant

Pant.

Pant.

Pants.

I just like the word pants. I like that it can be clothing, or a slang for something bad. I've adopted it completely. "That's pants!"


Look at Miss Skinny Pants. :)


One last look before she disappears...

I'm still here. But I'm disappearing pound by pound... every week. It is working. I will be skinny. I will be sexy. When I get there I may decide to become a nudist because I look so incredible. I should either be nude or wear only the most amazing clothes.

And if I eat... if I do... I promise, I won't be doing it at this place: